Far in advance of potty training, I started to think about it and perhaps even worry about it. So, I did some research and got a short and simple bit advice: Provide rewards for the desired result, not the mode of arrival. Desired Result = Dry Diaper (and eventually pants). Mode of Arrival = Using the Potty.
I put this information into storage in the back (deep dark cave) of my mind. And that was that until it was time to try for real (we did try half-heartedly once a few months ago, but he wasn't ready and we weren't at all committed).
This month was the real deal. I got the Potty Treats from the store. Nolan came. He was excited. I put them in a special jar. He was really excited. And then I chickened out of rewarding the Desired Result, fearing that Nolan wouldn't understand or that it would just frustrate him. So, Potty Treats became the reward for using the potty. One jelly bean (always orange) per potty usage. Then, as if to make up for my not following the short and simple advice, I sheepishly added the clause: And if you have a dry diaper you get 2 Potty Treats.
Now my wise 2 year old uses the potty all day long to get the treats. You're thinking: Great! Then it worked. What silly advice to reward the result. Potty Treats should be for using the potty.
Ahhh... but that's not the end of the story.
My wise 2 year old only uses the potty to get the treats. He is not concerned with having dry diapers and he even started to abuse the system; letting a little out in the potty (getting at treat) and coming back to let a little more out (getting a treat) and so on and then doing the rest in his diaper (I guess when he had enough jelly beans).
To remedy this situation (before I run out of orange jelly beans), I'm going to go buy a more enticing treat (bite sized candy bars?? popsicles? cookies? I haven't decided) and sheepishly amend the rules again: One Potty Treat for using the potty and One Extra Special Super Duper Potty Treat for having a dry diaper before using the potty. I haven't thought of all the ways this could backfire, but I guess I'm going to find out.
My Wise Son
I've just decided I'll be happy if Zoe's potty trained by kindergarten. Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteLove this post! We are still not committed to potty training. As desperate as I am to not change his big boy diapers anymore - we are just going to have to wait a few more months. I will keep this advice in the back of my mind as well. I hope it continues to go well!
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